Changing

by Bravely

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    Lyrics from the album "Changing"

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1.
Yesterday I called an old friend Asking do you remember when It’s crazy how a decades come and gone Man, that’s the strangest feeling Staring at another canvas You know I’ve had a lot of chances This could be my final dance I’ll do my best And speak my inner truth my inner truth I don’t want to keep on suffering Guided by the inner demand Yearning for the validation Fearing that I am somehow less than Summers coming to an ending The chorus of the forest singing The fire in my chest is burning Leaves are turning I am changing too I’m changing too
2.
04:11
I get infected with awful thoughts When I'm not on the lookout Disguised by my own mouth, they talk And they say pretty awful things Sometimes I argue And tell them they're untrue When they read me my fortune It feels like i have done all that I can I'm tired and i’ve failed at every plan So I backup slow and throw up both my hands I find myself alone inside my van Waiting for the show to finally end My whole life I’ve been chasing the same thing But I’m not sure that it’s worth the waiting This feeling won’t go away I need a distraction A thrill or a substance, a taste Wrapped up in foreign limbs I feel whole for a moment It’s insane and i know it An act for the desperate It feels like i have done all that I can I'm tired and i’ve failed at every plan So I backup slow and throw up both my hands I find myself alone, laying in bed Staring at my phone, it’s almost dead A contact list full of fair weather friends But i’m not sure that they’d even understand It feels like i have done all that I can I'm tired and i’ve failed at every plan So I backup slow and throw up both my hands I find myself alone inside my head Running through the thoughts I’ve always had A list full of unanswered questions So I’m not sure that it’s worth the waiting
3.
4.
I can feel it now Trying to float above it and not drown Like a wave, I clench my fists, try to resist It knocks me on the ground In parenthesis I can tell it’s always next to me Can’t escape, is this my fate? is there a way that i’ll ever be free? I can feel it now Like the April rain that’s coming down I’m afraid it knows my name Is it okay if i just go home now? Cause in parenthesis I can tell it’s always next to me Can’t escape, is this my fate? is there a way that i’ll ever be free? When I’m in the thick of it Feels like there’s no end to this Looking back on the mounting evidence (you know this, don’t you?) There’s a way, I know there is Change is slowing happening Nothing ever happens by accident (you know this, don’t you?) I can feel it now Trying to float above it and not drown Like a wave, I clench my fists, try to resist It knocks me on the ground In parenthesis I can tell it’s always next to me Can’t escape, is this my fate? is there a way that i’ll ever be free?
5.
This coffee’s pretty bitter. I ran out of milk and sugar, overthinking things Been losing it all year and the future’s so unclear Where have you been? Told myself it’d work out again and again and again and again But those shoes they quickly wore out. They never seemed to fit to begin The leaves are changing colors All my friends are getting older I don’t have control If i could bottle up a moment When the world wasn’t so broken I could fix it all But the truth that i ignored, when you said it again and again and again Kept me holding onto something that’s dead, that is dead I will always need your love I feed the flowers water Like breast milk from a mother I will keep them strong But soon it will be winter All the pedals, they will wither I will lose them all I pray that every spring they come back to life again and again and again And I hope I see the day that I will see your face my friend I will always need your love But we’ll never see each other as friends, just former lovers We can’t escape our history And this feeling tastes so bitter Can’t seem to make it better You know i like it light and sweet I will always need your love
6.
03:14
I’ve seen some graduations to close to funeral arrangements There’s nothing that you could of said to them to make a difference They got it bad, searching for something that was never missing Sparking the match, they wouldn’t leave the house while it was burning down I don’t know if I can do it like I used to do it Trying to control it all with misery all threaded through it I thought the cost of being happy was some years of suffering But now I’m thinking things’ll happen how they’re supposed to happen Oh, We’ve lost our place But somewhere down the road There may be an answer waiting We can crack the code It’s not a race So we can take it slow And someday we’ll remember those who didn’t make it through Stuck in prisons made of my own fears and old resentments They tried to clear it up with therapy and medications Your brain is broken so we’ll pump it full of serotonin And that’s all good but we need love outside an office visit Oh, We’ve lost our place But somewhere down the road There may be an answer waiting We can crack the code It’s not a race So we can take it slow And someday we’ll remember those who didn’t make it through
7.
02:26
Whos room was this before I moved in? This house was built in The 60s or something Were they laying where I'm laying Just thinking? I hear the train, it hasn't passed yet A new facet Of the room I inhabit Creaky floors and leaky faucets little remnants That stick in the ending I’m still there I had a dream that I got drunk and Then I broke in To the room I grew up in On the bed a boy was laying just staring At the crack on the ceiling Approached it slowly, like a coffin The floor was creaking But he was wasn't looking It was me when I was 13 I started talking But he couldn't hear me I'm still there I'm still there With every change We will retain what remained pure But we don't haunt old homes To it, we’re furniture A coat of paint is all it takes To clear the air But I'm still there I'm still there I'm still there
8.
02:06
I thought that time would take you away But the image of you is burned in my brain Went in with the wash Came out as a stain When will it fade? Now I only mention you in past tense Cause the love that I offered was at my expense Wherever I wander You're there in a sense This feeling so dense My love for you, it could fill this whole state I've locked it up but it's breaking the gates When I think of you I start feeling that weight When will this fade?

credits

released January 9, 2020

Music and Lyrics by Matthew Ryan Smith
Produced, Mixed, and Mastered by Doug Gallo @ AGL Sounds
Recorded in New Brunswick, NJ

Thomas D Vinko - Drums
Upright Bass - Kazim Zaidi
Pedal Steel - Tim Kelly
Harmonies - J O Smith
Harmonies - Lacey Ellis
Electric Guitar - Doug Gallo

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